In a Swamp Again

What the connection can be in these three ideas? I keep asking myself the same question but still obtaining no answer at all. She said that it is the most important part of all, while I am still impeded by my confusion of my ideas respectively. Sometimes the exhaustion just caught you, you got no where to go. You have been trying to do it precisely and getting things right, but you just come so close or even go astray beyond any expectation. You found it hard to compete with others whom she has praised. But others are gone. She thought someday you will go away as well. Let the time decide your leaving. People always say that love is a winding road. What could be a winding road? Writing the thesis is definitely not only a winding road but the torturing load. Others would hardly understand because they wish you could write it ASAP. Just write it without any hesitation. Of course I know I must write it without any hesitation! If this is a job to do, then it would take you much time more than you would imagine. Sometimes you study all day and gain a bit source you need, and sometimes you study nothing while you are in the middle of doing it. At times it depends upon the muse you naturally had. Then I ought to blame myself for how foolish I am since I am not yet figuring out the ideas in connection. Yet I have tried, and I am still on my road. The stone is still hung over there. But I don't want to grab it down. I desire to shoot it down instead. To look at it in fragmented pieces and disappear like fun powder plot, dancing all around and then flying to the orchid just like the wasp does. To have a special relationship with orchid, copulating with it as if the wasp thought the orchid is the real female that it stayed upon. Flying toward the orchid, just attempt to be a wasp temporarily and I promise no one will find you out. First of all you might as well crawl along the stone that you have broken by shooting, lest you be swamped in the muddiness. To make a connection to it, as if I had to get myself act together and then go deeper for what these three ideas have in common ─ to create a line of flight in connecting them as much as I can.