The Land of Conjurors

It always is hard to bend down myself in a way of behaving someone else. Separately, as you would call it, we have nothing in common, as if we had nothing to chat. No, not even more. You could have taken a leave in front of me. Sympathy saved you more or less. I wished we could go for a different way, but we didn't. I may do my own thing. And you, you keep busying with your business. This could be the best way for both of us, what could be other way we wish? Nothing that has to be pretended since we go our separate way at the moment. A world that is waiting for us, and this is the last thing I wish. What is the freedom anyway? I thought we all knew, but do we really hold on our belief and go our way? Turning, it is as if the direction still has its way to turn to. The possibility of the direction still remains.

What the connection can be in these three ideas? I keep asking myself the same question but still obtaining no answer at all. She said that it is the most important part of all, while I am still impeded by my confusion of my ideas respectively. Sometimes the exhaustion just caught you, you got no where to go. You have been trying to do it precisely and getting things right, but you just come so close or even go astray beyond any expectation. You found it hard to compete with others whom she has praised. But others are gone. She thought someday you will go away as well. Let the time decide your leaving. People always say that love is a winding road. What could be a winding road? Writing the thesis is definitely not only a winding road but the torturing load. Others would hardly understand because they wish you could write it ASAP. Just write it without any hesitation. Of course I know I must write it without any hesitation! If this is a job to do, then it would take you much time more t

Something of traditional Chinese words printed on the leaflet. When I unfolded the paper, there was the artistic inscription upon. The landlady told me if it was the time to leave here since there was a man who would like to offer me a vacant apartment in Taipei. It seemed to be a better opportunity for me to abandon all of the things right away and make my elopement toward that man. But I just received an artistic leaflet that inscribed some traditional Chinese words imitated by an artist's handwriting. The leaflet was a sea-blue paper with the black lightface. At first I thought I couldn't recognize this artist's handwriting until I get it close to me. The words were not merely the words but something more like drawing within. At first I saw the word "條" at the first position and then after three words was "離". Others were forgotten except this two words especially on my mind. The word "條" looked so complicated for its line in disorder, portr

It always can be difficult to live in such life that we desire to be. You found out that everything you keep striving for turns out to be the others' expectation in turn. Life always can be hard, but a new life may begin as we turn on its motion. I know you may think I am abnormally romantic and full of fantasy. Nonetheless it does not mean that we can never exert our hope in such ailing condition so far. I am never to be highly turgid with my words for any evil intention. If any, I think it would be much of the higher creative thinking and deeper thoughts in the process of constitution. Life is so annoying. If you see that there is someone comparing you with previous one, what you ever wish lies in the fact that he or she can be blind to see the singularity of an individual. The tricky thing for you tends to follow the one whom you believe and dedicate yourself to such labyrinth of back and forth. But life can be contingent as if something miraculously brings in without any effort

Many things assemble altogether this time. It is as if the coincidence has caught me in no time. If this is not a hope, then I doubt that what the real hope is. It is the hope which I truly believe. Today I found a news denoting that BigBang's leader G-Dragon was inspired by the Francis Bacon's artworks. It becomes a surprise for me because I am in the study of Francis Bacon's painting through Gilles Deleuze's perspective. Funny how it can be? I totally know nothing about it until I see the news today. This is such a bless for me, no matter for my thesis or my passion for what I love. When I first see BigBang's MV "Bae Bae," I feel a fervor inside me rather than some other commercial taste for pop music. This fervor can hardly be explained just by words. Yet, definitely it might have something to do with the commercial mechanism, but it still breaks new ground in creating such MV based upon the aesthetic vision. G-Dragon mentions that he has no intention t

Last night I've been thinking the way to dealing with her while I was exercising at the park. Something in me was summoned up during the walking. I became realized that nothing could take the place of my position and decision. Still I must go on my way without others bothering. Such tangle could not go on, and I ought to be aware of what I will be doing in the future since the time awaited no one in particular. I decided not to go to the speech this time, while she encouraged me to go. The embarrassing moment would not mainly fall into the encounter with her but the literary field in the class. The field about the issue of diaspora hardly intrigued me at all. If you were forced to listen to the speech that you were truly not into, plus you had to stay a whole day at there, how would you feel about it? In addition, we needed to read four papers in necessity beforehand. Perhaps I was complaining of such well-organised and meticulous manner for the plan of speech. The mechanism of the